Monday, May 26, 2008

A danger to those around me?

Yesterday.

This post is about what transpired at a petrol pump in Punjabi Bagh, concerning me, mera dost and a fat lady, while I was driving my friends swift, when? You guessed it, yesterday.

Okay, due to certain events that happened ,see here, I really couldn’t drive a lot, and yesterday I just felt like driving around, so laying waste to my friends demands of going to some pub (I mean he actually suggested Bacchus !! Bacchus = cheapest place I know which can also pass of as a brothel), I decided just to drive around. Okay I guess ill fast forward through the part in which I’m supposed to describe the lush green meadows and the scenery and tell you about the incident.

Okay the scene of the crime was a petrol pump ( you wouldn’t have guessed would you?) there was a couple (so as to speak) which had just gotten off from a scooter and were using the i-don’t-know-what-its-called in front me. The guy was ummm, I don’t even remember what he was like that just shows that he was a part of the nameless and faceless millions but the female was HUGE, I mean the largest individual I have ever come across ever!! Anyways my amigo noticed,
HIM:I dare you to hit the fat one, in frount of the car.
ME:R U INSANE??
HIM: Chal, for 1000 bucks.
ME: Dude your soo juvenile.
HIM: Soo your backing out ryt?? LOOSER.
ME:ummmmm
I was less than game for the challenge (as you may have noticed!! But hey he was going too far!!), anyways I took it, and just pretended to look at the side and nudged her at like 2 km/hr and 50 rpm, that’s when colossus fell, fell hard. I got out and tried my best to help. I would have actually succeeded in keeping a straight face, but my friend decided that the best course of action was to laugh wildly while thumping the bonnet of the car. That didn’t exactly help, so in my attempts to help her I ended up coming across as umm a not very nice person, well I was shooed away as I watched the victim try to get up and fail I guess she would have managed it in the end after being helped buy her husband and half a dozen attendants. I got of out that place, collected the well earned 1000 bucks. Reached home. And I run into my mom at the gate! Then it happened.


HIM: Aunty you have quite a child!!
MOM: Why what happened?
ME: Nothing maa, he just means to say that I can drive well.
HIM: Haan haan, hitting pedestrians does qualify as driving nicely!
MOM: What??
ME: ( I give up at this point of time and leave, praying that he doesn’t relay too much to mother dearest)


15 minutes later I am confronted by dad. This is what I hate about Sundays, I mean parents are everywhere!! Trust me he didn’t see humor anywhere, I mean what was an innocent nudge at 2 km/hr which wouldn’t even hurt a fly was made to look like an attempt to murder!! Dad went on and on about how I was actually a danger to those around me, and how the next thing I know I might be involved in random street killings. All in all he made me feel like a rapist, and it wasn’t over there, dad drove me to that bastard’s place to give back the 1000 bucks, I didn’t even attempt to ask him is I could drive!

The worst part here is that I can kiss the Fabia I was supposed to get college first year goodbye!! Lesson learnt, next time you do what your friend dared you to do, just don’t bring him home!!

All in all just another day with me and my luck
Me.
******
PS:Okay, Just in case you think I'm an evil demented bastard, please understand that it wasn't meant to cause her harm. She wouldn't have fallen too if she was't slightly chubby. I respect women, and I made sure that I wasn't supposed to hurt her. It was just a harmless little nudge from a car something that I am sure that you have gotten. I hope you people don't take me for a convict (like certain blood relatives of mine) and take this incident in the good humour it was intended. So if you feel I was wrong in anyway, I'm Sorry, thers nothing you can do about it..

8 comments:

Unknown said...

bhatnagar youre so evil man!!
lol..

Rahul Bhatnagar said...

Yaar, this isin's a scrap book, don't treat it like one.

Rahul Bhatnagar said...

Haan, lesson learnt. Or more like, Lesson forcefully taught by my dad.

The Nutty Optimist said...

Not cool dude
I mean seriously not kool at all
What the hell were you trying to prove???
and that friend of yours is even better to give you away...
anyways its gud that you at least wrote abt it and asked for opinions.
and i guess your dad is kinda right abt the lesson part but definitely not abt the part where he calls u a threat to others..........
be cool dawg

Swati said...

well....u hav got ur list of advices after this incident..so wont add mine coz obviously, it will be on the same lines just said above but this shows that u r a gutsy guy but with no bad intentions and i thnk it would be a big fallacy to believe that u r a danger to others ..

Rahul Bhatnagar said...

@abin: It wasn't meant to be cool, dude. As you have pointed out in the later part of ur comment, i published this post just to opinions and to point out that this isin't a moral issue. It was a nudge, the type you might have gotten loads of times at parking lots. And have you considered changing your name? ...peace.

@swati: Thanks for understanding.

imperfect said...

You have too many escapades woth accidents and blah.
So finally which college?

imperfect said...

And updates?