Reincarnation.

Hello world. Kaise ho?

Okay, so 2 years and 6 months, yeah, I know mammals with shorter lifespans. Considering that anyone who ever read my blog has probably moved on to greener pastures, like LinkedIn posts,  Facebook Photography pages  or raising kids, this does seem like starting anew.

Basically, this is what my side of the universe has been buzzing with:

1. I grew up, left college.
2. I got a Job.
3. Then I quit it.
4. Also I started something of my own.
5. I haven't really learnt how to drive yet.
6. Oh, and I still like it when lists end with even numbers.

I do get that I'm slightly rusty while posting stuff that isn't accompanied with a meme, but then again, I did learn quite quickly after my first couple of blog posts, where i usd 2 typ lyk dis. Here's hoping I'm still as quick on the uptake ( I should be, cause: 7. I got into MENSA, and yes, I did think of a way to sneak that in.)

Reincarnation it is.
Me.

PS: There's still something about writing here that makes me feel 17 again. :)

The theory of everything.

 

The age of rocks vs The rock of ages

THIS is what one should not be spending time doodling on walls 8 hours before a Distributed Computing end-semester examination when you have 1000+ pages left and to top it all you're down with dengue.

Fml.
Me

Women101

Firstly I’m in Calcutta, basically to load up on some mata-pita ka pyaar before I go back to the Assam ki vadiyan  which are waiting for me. I turn to my cool little blog to while away the next couple of hours, the pretext being that it’s 2 AM, my flight for  Guwahati is in 4 hours and  my parents flew away on a jet plane 6 hours ago. Anyway, I was told by someone that my blog usually is some sort of glorified amalgamation of kiddishness and cynicism and I should try something new before actually judging people whose writings are a confluence of meaning and contemplations, and here it goes.

Note: Do tell me if it gets a tad bit boring, then next time I can write poems! :)

Okay, it’s about 2 women I know. One’s barely a college student while the other’s a working independent executive staying alone in a new city in her mid twenties let’s call them A and B (clearly, I’m NOT that great with story telling). About a year ago, I broke up (she prefers to use the phrase ‘dumped her the second time’) with A. There were circumstances and loads of other factors at play but I think THAT will suffice. Anyway, a couple of months later I realized that I made a mistake, and sort off did the stereotypical running around like a puppy, she wanted none of it. I guess she realized ‘she was happy earlier but she’s happier now’. Enter B. SHE was is was is my friends girlfriend.  I spoke to her for quite a bit, she was going through a rough patch with her paramour and did advise me to go all hopeless romantic on mine. Though her suggestions did fall flat, it was fun to know I could actually pull off the filmy things for someone. After a month or so, we realized that it was not happening, we cursed A, laughed a bit on how idiotic some of my actions were. She let me on to a bit of her fucked-up-ness and that was that. This blog post would have ended here had I not got a phonecall from B yesterday.

Basically, my friend realized he was screwing up, called her up, apologized and tried to  get things back to normal again, but THAT is when things get interesting. Speaking to her just took me back to my conversations with A from 6 months ago. What was really remarkable was that I was literally hearing the same dialogues, I mean ‘I was a doormat’, ‘I need time for myself now’, ‘I was obcessed with him earlier but now I’ll obsess over work’ . It was EXACTLY the same rhetoric. And THEY were coming from someone who was basically my Valakyrie of hopeless romance. I didn’t exactly know how to reason with her, so I heard her out. Cut the phone. And here I am. I guess most of this post makes me sound like some weird cynic who’s cursing women and who even Gandhi would advocate burning alive, but it really is not so. I’ve been friends with both of them, seen them through very weird times, heard them cry etc, and I really REALLY believe that it is for the better that they’re not blindly following someone who put them in that predicament, but what’s fascinating is that, this hulking up didn’t happen when they were in that state of ‘unspeakable pain’ it happened when they were finally going to get the compromise that they were craving for months. I know both of them might not like me hyphenating them with eachother or summarizing stuff with a sentence. But it’s just so obvious. I guess people, women even more so are hardwired to appreciate what they have to work towards (Yeah, so if you’re one of those ‘serial likers’ on facebook, it’s NOT going to help.)

I guess I FINALLY know why people adopt the ‘women are sex objects’ attitude, cause it probably works better, but I guess it’s just one of those things in life that makes your jaw drop. This post isn’t meant to be some sort off killer guide to women, but as that friend of mine is going to realize very VERY soon it’s true, in facts and in surmise. It does seem like that double date I planned with him a year ago clearly isn’t happening.

Anyway, I’ll get some sleep leaving you with my co-author for tonight....

THIS is Partho Dada, sadly I couldn’t completely do justice to his points on this topic due to my rustic Bengali, but yeah we did end up making some amazing Macher Jhol for dinner. I COULD have just gone clubbing on my last night in Kolkata, but this was just so much better. :)

P.S.    I’m kinda psyched about my first date in almost a year!
Me

Teletubbies.

Just got the answer-script for a course I have this semester called Optimization. If you've done linear programming in school it's just like that on steroids and multiple dimensions. Anyway, due to a substantial lack of attendance I was compelled to come up with my own method to attempt the exam, I remember walking out of the examination hall feeling all full of myself and prodigious but THIS is how my answer in the one question exam was marked.

'"Wrong" procedure, in the sense Not (sic) taught in class. Don't be Prof Einstein.'

I guess there's a reason why the course was not called 'Innovative Optimization'.

Aargh. 

Me.

P.S. Yeah the handwriting's always sucked. :)

P.P.S. And I DID give up on meaningful titles a while back.

Independence Day!

Okay, I'm in Calcutta, primarily because someone really close to me is admitted in a hospital and the Doctors used the words 'biopsy' and 'cancer' in the same sentence a couple of times, and as my only experience with the word 'cancer' has come through movies, where in the best case scenario it's used as a plot device to kill off important characters and 'motivate' the protagonist, I can clearly state that the last few days have been daunting. Well thankfully the biopsy results were negative for cancerous growth so now I can just curse the doctors and get some sleep. :)

I'll leave you with what I ran into on my way to Calcutta when I got off at some random railway station (you know, the ones that have like one platform and look like a crime-scene) to look for something to eat: 

Sorry for the picture quality but it's hard to snap clear pictures when you see a guy with THAT hairstyle in the dead of the night and the middle of nowhere amidst a very VERY conspicuous stench of cannabis. They were probably just praying or something but somehow I couldn't take the words 'Human Sacrifice' out of my head. :)

Me.
P.S. This post is probably a little disconnected. Need Sleep.

 

Ta da!

Pardon the enthusiasm apparent from the title, We'll I haven't blogged with such consistency since 4-odd years ago, I guess there ARE some similarities between the last year of college and the last year of school but I might also be motivated by the fact that a month or so ago, one of my cousins started this food-centered blog, and she ALREADY has more followers than me (by more than a factor of 10!) I would have put a link to her blog, but that would just lead her back to here.

Ah well, I guess not being particularly good at something in this world which is centered around interest groups does sort off make you wish you were born into tribe that talks in clicks. So yeah, I've clearly lost to my sister, the Valkyrie of culinary literature, but this is about me and MY life, brace yourself. 

I remember a quote that I came up with some time ago, (and also acted quite smug about. yeah I do THAT) "You don't need a series of life altering events to alter your life." Well, for the past 6 odd months, I've had nothing BUT 'life altering events', that go from cracking ribs, run-ins with cops, major career-threatening fuckups at college, over-the-top dramatic heartbreak and almost single-handedly messing up the lives of two close friends. So yeah, you might not need life altering events to alter your life but they sure tend to speed up the process when they occur.

I hope haven't really reached a 'self proclaimed motivational speaker' on the annoying-persona scale, but I did come up with a kick ass analogy. Try answering this:

What'll happen if you take a shot of [insert desired drink] for all those things in life that have turned out worse than you expected them to?

a. I'll be staring sober at an unused glass and a filled bottle.

b. I'll be tipsy.

c. I'll be [insert expletive] drunk.

d. I'll be dead from alcohol poisoning before midnight.

Let's face it, the odds of you meeting a genie as she tap-dances down a rainbow and grants you 3 wishes are probably more than you choosing (a), in all probability you'll be somewhere between (c) and (d), and that my friends, is exactly what's wrong with the world. It's in the definitions of 'expected' and 'worse'. I can't give you solutions or answers but here's hoping I gave you perspective. :)

And in case the last paragraph reminded you of how much trauma you've had to face in life (well it DID intend to!) Here's something that'll make you feel good about yourself. Try taking this personality test, which I remember from my last sems psychology course, it really craps out amazing personality types which serve to remind you how psychology is the perfect pseudo-intellectual equivalent of a horoscope (only here, you won't be unlucky to be born a Virgo or something). Anyway this is what it thought I was. [NOTE: Takes 15 odd minutes]

I would have continued to rant on, but I'm sort off in the middle of setting up my room, that might just take a while, it looked like this till 2 days ago. :)

 

Me.

P.S. From now on I'm totally blogging as often as I used to, also with labels! (In your face uber-successful-blogger-sister!)

P.P.S. Don't judge the room. :)