Monday, May 31, 2010

5 hours ago

We cut to the chase.
Due to the events of

http://carboncluster.blogspot.com/2008/05/danger-to-those-around-me.html
And
http://carboncluster.blogspot.com/2008/03/this-day-goes-real-long.html

My dad had somehow managed to convince himself that I wasn't really good with driving, (yeah you can't blame him), anyway due to the 'social outcry' against 19 year olds who 'can't' drive, daddy dearest deemed it fit to wake me up at 5:00 AM to 'test' my driving skills, he COULD have justified the time with some early-morning-fresh-air-crap, but well I'm guessing that telling me that it was 'in public interest' was somehow supposed to bring out the best in me.

Well, there's precious little that even a 'known public offender' like me can go wrong with in an empty ground at 5 AM, so after litmus test I was driving back home, when things got interesting...

DAD: Try taking a U-Turn on this road. (In this whole 'THIS is a surprise test!' tone)
Me: Wtf? Fine...
DAD: Turn the steering back now!
Me: Wait, let the car start to straighten...
DAD: TOO LATE! (Lunges for the steering, as if our lives are in grave danger as we turn on this empty street, FIRST GEAR!)
Me: DAD LEAVE! DAD LEAVE! DAD LEAVE! AARGGGHHHHH

Okay, there was this brief bit during which both me and my dad were hanging on either side of the steering, and it IS kind of difficult to control cars when a 50 year old man is trying to pull the steering down with his body weight on the other side! There was an open drain running on the street side, and as if this all conclusive driving test needed more of a silver lining, one of the tyres gets lodged in it!

Well what's amazing is how NO ONE listens to teenagers, because when I got back home, my mom tried to reason with me about how 'I should have been prepared for this'! As if its the mark of a good driver to handle things when people jump onto the steering wheel without warning! Its almost as if I was getting the 'गाड़ी चलाना कब सीखेगा? कलमुहे!'

Ohh and if things needed to get any better, my dad somehow managed to convince himself that my look of immense WTF-ness was in fact because I was embarrassed and saddened, he hence summed up the morning with a 'Don't be sad, a week like this with me, and you'll be good to go on roads'!

I miss the time when dad would just buy me things if he thought I was sad.

Totally looking forward to more 5 AM death rides.

Me.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Ye olde legend of yore.

And I blog again.

‘Once upon a time there was a boy, he was prety intelligent and nice only. He had many friends, he loved them very much. He was not fake and dishonest. His skin color was white, he studied in college, he loved it very much. He did not play very many sports but he liked sitting and watching his cosin sisters play in the sun. He liked colours- blue purpole and green. His favorite book in the world was Harry Potter. He read it every day. He tried to play the guitar in college but played one song only. He had a veryyyyy long nose, but he said he didn’t. Ok, I don’t know how to end.’

THIS is what happens when you dare your 8 year old cousin to write a fairytale. Ohh and I’m supposed to be the ‘intelligent and nice only boy’! I do like Harry Potter but she wrote that probably because let’s face it, isn’t that the only series kids have heard of and yeah, the one song only- Pull Me Under, Dream Theatre.

P.S. Typo’s are intentional and in accordance with the manuscript. And I do NOT have a long nose.

And yeah, that's the cutest thing I’ve ever read. :)

Me.